Mary: To Protect Her Heart (Other Pens, Mansfield Park Book 3) Read online

  “You should try it,” Tom continued.

  “I am all that is proper already,” Mary retorted.

  Tom laughed. “You are perhaps chaste, but you are not proper. You delight far too much in scandal for me to believe it. And, I would think you would be the sort of lady who would hold her wedding vows tightly only until she had borne the requisite number of children.”

  Mary stopped walking before they got to the steps which led into the ballroom. “I will not be a mistress to any man whether I am married or not.”

  “Are you certain?” Tom’s tone was slightly mocking, causing Mary to bristle.

  “I am positive. I will not be like either the admiral or his wife,” she snapped. How could he even suggest such a thing?

  “Yet you surround yourself with friends who are, and you encouraged your brother to be such a person.” He leveled a hard stare on her. “Prove you are not.”

  She blinked. How did one prove such a thing other than by getting married and never straying from her husband?

  “Proceed through the remainder of the season in a fashion that is opposed to how you have to this point. Find some way to show that you care about something other than yourself. Pick a proper fellow and see if you would suit. I shall be doing the same sort of thing. I am not returning to my old habits and haunts.”

  “Is this some sort of punishment for having encouraged Henry to attend that dinner party where I knew Maria would be?”

  Tom shrugged. “Perhaps it is, but there is nothing compelling you to take my suggestion. So, it would make an ineffective punishment, do you not think?”

  Indeed, it would when she considered it as such.

  He shrugged again. “Think about it. The alternative could lead to dire consequences.” He lifted his cane. “I know of what I speak.”

  She tipped her head and studied his features. He did not seem to be taunting her. He looked absolutely serious, which, in all the time she had known Tom Bertram, was not an expression he wore very often. “I will give it some thought, but I cannot promise you anything,” she finally said. “These things are not so simple for ladies.”

  “That is all I ask,” Tom replied as he led her into the ballroom. “Ah, there is Mr. Tenley.” He drew her along the left-hand side of the ballroom to the gentleman. Then, with a bow, he took his leave, but not without first saying, “I look forward to your response.”

  Mr. Tenley’s brows rose halfway to his hairline.

  “He wished for some advice,” Mary hedged. Then, she smiled brightly. “We do not want to miss our dance, now do we?”

  “No, no. Of course, not.”

  Mr. Tenley was far too easily led. But at present, Mary was happy for it, for it would give her time to sort out some of the troubling thoughts with which Tom Bertram had left her.

  Chapter 2

  Gabriel Durward glanced up from the paper in front of him and gave a nod of welcome to his friend, Tom Bertram, but continued his conversation with the gentleman seated at the table with him.

  “She’s American then?”

  “She is,” the man replied. “A beauty, too.”

  Gabe studied the manifest in front of him. “You say she was taken clean?”

  His companion nodded. “She’ll pass the prize court.”

  If the document he was looking at was correct, the contents of this ship could net him a healthy profit.

  “She’s worth refitting,” his companion suggested.

  Another ship? Gabe rubbed his chin. Was he ready to take on another? “I will take a look at her tomorrow, but that’s all I can promise. However, as far as her cargo is concerned, I am extremely interested, and you know I pay well.” He folded the document he had been reading and tucked it in his pocket. “Of course, you know I must compare this inventory with the one presented to the court before our agreement is finalized. I do appreciate the copy and your consideration. It is not that I do not trust you, but there are those who would attempt to take advantage.”

  The man across from him laughed. “Take advantage of Captain Durward? They’d have to be a fool to try.”

  Gabe inclined his head. “There are plenty of fools in this world.” He had met several over the years. A few had attempted to take advantage of him. One or two had succeeded, but they would not be trying to do so again. He had made certain of that.

  “Tomorrow?” his companion asked.

  Gabe nodded.

  “Then I had best get back to the dancing.” The man across from him rose and gave a small bow.

  “Business at a ball?” Tom asked as he settled into the chair vacated by the gentleman to whom Gabe had been talking.

  “Does one not come to balls to speculate on investments?” Gabe leaned back and smiled into his glass of port before taking a drink. “My investments are just more at home on the water than in a ballroom. However, they are still beautiful and wealthy ladies.”

  Tom shook his head. “They are ships, not ladies.”

  Gabe shrugged. “Perhaps to a land lover such as yourself. How’s the leg?”

  “It is only slightly painful. However, I am finding it grows stronger each day.”

  “I am glad to hear it. And did you find the lady with whom you needed to speak?” That was the whole reason Tom had attended this ball – to find some woman who had caused a disaster to unfold in his family through her scheming. He had told Gabe that he wished to learn a few things that would hopefully put his mind at ease.

  Tom nodded as a small smile curled his lips. “I am at peace.”

  Gabe clapped him on the shoulder. That was excellent news. Gabe was anxious to see Tom finally find some sort of rest for his spirit.

  He had met Tom at the docks in London about three years ago now. The fellow’s family had an interest in Antigua, and Gabe had an interest in the goods their interest might supply for him. However, he had found more than just a means of making a few pounds in that meeting. He had found one of his best friends. Tom was not like the majority of the ton. He did not care where Gabe had earned his money or why his eyes were so dark.

  He took another swallow of his port. For all the devil-may-care swagger that Tom Bertram portrayed, he was a sensitive soul who was accepting of many whom others might discard.

  “You are completely finished attempting to be what you are not?” Gabe asked quietly.

  Tom nodded. “As finished with it as you are with adventuring.” He shrugged. “I think we have both found our lot in life.”

  “And made peace with it,” Gabe added.

  “Yes, finally. Thankfully for you, it did not take nearly dying to discover your path.”

  Gabe pulled in a deep breath and expelled it slowly. “I faced death more than once before I came to my senses. You were just quicker to cotton on than I.” He swallowed the last of his port. “In fact, it was my father’s death last year which firmly set my feet on English soil for good.” He had not confessed that to anyone until now, and Tom looked surprised as Gabe expected he would. “My mother arrived while you were attempting to escape the cold clutches of the afterlife.”

  “You should write poetry,” Tom teased.

  “Who’s to say I do not,” Gabe returned with ease. “Death sounded too crass when speaking of a friend.”

  “Is your mother adjusting well?”

  “As well as can be expected. My bill for heating will be significant until she adjusts to the lack of warmth in the air, and she is finding it challenging to look so different. However, all the gentlemen who I have had around to do business have been polite, which has helped.” He sighed. “If I could tolerate India as my father did, I would take her back there.” He shook his head. “But I am not a company man as he was. I wish to find my own way in life, and that does limit me.”

  “You also love this damp, cold climate,” Tom added. “Not even those of us who have lived here all our lives find it as pleasant as you do. I must say that was the one thing I appreciated about Antigua. It was warm.”

  “Has yo
ur father…” he stopped as a vision of loveliness in a cream coloured gown with a deep wine-coloured overdress entered the room on the arm of some gentleman. He probably knew who the chap was and could figure it out if he put his mind to it. However, he’d rather just admire the lady on what’s his name’s arm.

  “No, he has not disposed of it yet,” Tom answered the question that had only been half spoken. “Mansfield is still too dependent on the funds.”

  Gabe turned his attention back to his friend for a moment. “That is too bad,” he muttered before looking in the direction of the lady who had captured his interest and, to his surprise, was approaching their table.

  “Miss Crawford,” Tom said as he pushed up from his seat to stand with Gabe at her arrival before them.

  “Mr. Bertram,” Mary said before turning to her escort and sending him away with a whispered word.

  Tom moved to pull out a chair for her. “May I present my friend, Mr. Gabriel Durward.”

  “It is a pleasure to meet you, Mr. Durward.”

  “Gabe, this is Miss Mary Crawford.”

  Gabe bowed and extended a greeting before retaking his seat. Miss Crawford looked a bit uneasy as if she wished to say something but was uncertain if she should.

  “Was there something with which I could help you?” Tom asked her.

  Mary’s eyes shifted to Gabe and back.

  “He knows most of my secrets, Miss Crawford.” Tom motioned for Gabe to stay when he attempted to rise, which was satisfactory with him. He would not find it a hardship to sit here with the lovely Miss Crawford. He did not even need to be included in the conversation as just admiring her beauty would be a pleasure.

  “I was thinking about what you said in the garden,” she began.

  Gabe attempted to keep his features from giving anything away, but one brow refused to listen and lifted slightly. So this was the lady Tom had been seeking? This vision of loveliness was the cause of so much strife in the Bertram family? Miss Crawford did not look capable of such to him, but then he had learned that a dangerous vessel did not always appear to be hazardous at first blush.

  “And have you come to a conclusion?” Tom asked.

  “I have.”

  “Are you accepting my challenge?”

  For a moment, Gabe thought Miss Crawford was going to be ill. Whatever had Tom challenged her to do?

  “I am.” She blew out a breath. “But I do not know how. My brother,” she glanced at Gabe uneasily again before dropping her voice lower and continuing, “Henry will not speak to me. I have driven him away.”

  Tears gathered in her eyes, but she resolutely blinked them away. She might appear to be soft and delicate, but in that moment, Gabe knew better. Miss Crawford was very much like Tom. She was a sensitive, seeking soul, floundering in the storm, trying to find her way to a safe harbour.

  “I have already become what I feared. I just had not realized it until you pointed it out to me.”

  “What do you fear?” Gabe smiled at her when she turned startled eyes toward him. “I apologize. I do tend to be direct at times.”

  Tom laughed. “And excessively curious, but his intentions are good,” he assured Mary. “However, I think I can answer that one for you.” He looked at Gabe. “You’ve only been home for a short time, but have you heard of Admiral Crawford?”

  Gabe’s eyes grew wide. He had heard tales of the admiral’s exploits from several sources. Some of the tales were of conquests made in war that had earned him a handsome fortune, but many of the stories of conquests had nothing to do with war but everything to do with his treatment of women.

  “I see you have,” Mary said. “He is my uncle. My brother and I were raised by him and his wife after our parents died.”

  “He was a talented sailor.” Gabe could think of nothing else to say about the man that was polite.

  “Yes, we can agree on that,” Mary replied. “And we would also likely agree that he is not a particularly agreeable person.”

  Gabe shrugged. Not particularly agreeable seemed a bit too soft for a man such as the admiral about whom he had heard tell.

  “I loathe him, Mr. Durward. I have for many years. And so, it pains me to realize that I have in some respects become like him.”

  Her gaze dropped to the table, and her cheeks flushed.

  Tom scratched his cheek. “Go dance with my friend, and I will give some thought to how you might start afresh.”

  “I beg your pardon?” Shock suffused Mary’s face.

  “Are you already engaged for this dance?” Tom asked.

  “No, but…”

  “Then I see no reason you cannot drag Gabe away from business for a few minutes while I contemplate your dilemma.”

  “I have explained very little of it,” Mary retorted.

  Tom smiled and shook his head. “I think I know you better than you give me credit. It is my sister who is now divorced, is it not?”

  Mary’s brow furrowed, and her eyes narrowed.

  “I am not saying that to condemn you. I know from our discussion earlier that you acted without a thought about the results. I was listening. However, you must acknowledge that I might be able to think about your predicament without further explanation.” He shrugged. “And I have read the account in the paper about the confrontation with your brother and Lady St. James.”

  “That was you?” Gabe asked.

  “Yes,” Mary said with some force. “That was me. I am the horrid person who treated her brother badly because she felt a need to please her friends.” Her eyes grew wide, and her hand flew to cover her mouth.

  “Congratulations, Gabe. I do not think I have ever seen Miss Crawford unsettled.”

  “I apologize,” Gabe offered. “That was not my intent.”

  Tom leaned forward. “Truly, Miss Crawford, I intend to help you if I can, but I will need some time to think.” He looked at Gabe. “You have no other meetings arranged for this evening, do you?”

  “No, one business meeting per soiree is my standard allotment.” He rose from his seat. “I would be honored if you would allow me the privilege of dancing with you, Miss Crawford.” He held up a finger and turned to Tom. “Do I need to approach her chaperone first?”

  Tom shook his head and chuckled. “If you were to come to these soirees with more than business on your mind, you might be able to retain the rules of polite society more easily.”

  If there were more enchanting creatures like Miss Crawford at these soirees, Gabe would gladly come to them without conducting business. Unlike most of the ladies he had met at soirees, Miss Crawford was interesting. There were secrets that lay behind her dark eyes, and that enticed him.

  “No,” Tom continued, “I am a friend and have made the proper introductions. I believe you will not be chastised by Mrs. Grant.”

  “My sister,” Mary offered when Gabe looked between them in confusion. “She has accompanied me tonight.”

  “Well, then, if I am not being improper, will you dance with me?” He extended his hand to her.

  “Yes,” she replied with a smile as she placed her hand in his, “I will dance with you.”

  Chapter 3

  Mary took her place across from Mr. Durward. So far this season, this was the first set of dances that she would dance with someone to whom she had only just been introduced. Or, at least, it would be the first set of dances she had danced with a new acquaintance who was not married. Sarah, Lady St. James, was often introducing her to gentlemen, but rarely single gentlemen. They were almost always married and looking to present themselves as desirable to more ladies than just their wives. Oh! She was no better than the admiral’s mistress, Fredricka! Mary might not warm the beds of any of the gentlemen with whom she danced, but she did nothing to encourage them to treat their wives with respect.

  She closed her eyes against the spinning of the room and the churning of her stomach. This was at the same time both the worst and the best ball she had ever attended. It was horrible for all the times s
he was being reminded of the admiral in comparison to herself, but it was wonderful that she could see herself for who she had become because without that knowledge she knew that no change would be possible. How she would change — well, that was still not decided.

  “Are you well, Miss Crawford?”

  Mary opened her eyes and smiled into the deep brown, concerned eyes of the gentleman across from her. “I have not been feeling quite myself this evening,” she admitted.

  “Do you wish to sit out? I am happy to do so. Your wish is my command.”

  She shook her head. “I am certain when the music begins, I will be so distracted that I will not have a moment to consider my spinning head.”

  Gabe tipped his head and studied her closely. “I do not believe that is a good idea.”

  Mary did not turn her head, but her eyes shifted to look at the gentlemen on either side of Gabe. It did not appear as if they were listening to their conversation. “It is nothing more than my thoughts concerning what Mr. Bertram and I were talking about. I will be well.”

  “Are you certain?” Her partner’s brow was furrowed, and he did not look at all convinced that she was well.

  For a moment, Mary feared he would drag her from the line. She turned her most alluring smile on him – the one that worked on every man she had ever met. “I am certain.”

  The furrow between his eyes deepened. “I do not like it,” he muttered. “But I will stay unless I see you stumble. Then, I will insist you leave the floor.”

  Her brows rose quite high. He seemed impervious to her smile. That was unusual.

  “I should insist at present, but it will create too great a stir,” he added.

  She shivered slightly under his piercing gaze. He was a rather intense gentleman. “I know very little about you.” She attempted to use that same smile again.

  “That is because we have only just met.”

  Blast! He was still skewering her with that concerned expression. Would that the music would start!

  “I have only been in London for five years now. Three completely, the two prior I was both here and not here, but then that is how it is for the captain of a ship, is it not?”